Friday, November 11, 2011

Top Biblical Personalities in Your Workplace...stolen by Ted

Hey all. I've been super occupied with studying for the GREs, which I take tomorrow (wish me luck!!). However, I didn't want you to think I forgot about you. A friend of mine posted this on her Facebook page. She got it from "The Weekly Bang", which is an orthodox mailing list/website, so all credit goes to them. Pretty funny stuff!! 


Top Biblical Personalities in Your Workplace
Adam – The first hire, got in trouble for eating something from the office fridge that was forbidden. Been demoted to grunt work ever since.

Noah - that guy who brings his pet to work. 


Abraham – Considered a pioneer in the field, founded the company through much family sacrifice


Moses - Left his current less desirable situation and brought his staff with him. Had to split the place after they worked him like a slave


Pharaoh - CEO whose ego plagues the company and eventually has to let people go


David - Somehow wins pitch over Goliath competitor and overnight becomes the reigning king of the office


Joshua – Completed the full corporate takeover of Canaan and expanded the office locations countrywide


Joseph - Dreams of being star CEO, and is annoyingly public about it. His clothing is flamboyant, but he sure is a charmer.


Potiphar's Wife – The first sexual harassment claim in the workplace


Ahashveirosh – The boss who sends emails and makes major decisions when sleepless at 2AM


Jonah - Swallowed by a whale of a project, hasn't been seen in months


Tamar - The office harlot, who somehow brings integrity to those around her


Shaul – Delusional CEO who doesn't believe he has just been replaced


Korah - Occupy Wall St.


Cain & Abel - Duo who always seem to being going to lunch/smoke breaks together, that is, until one had the other axed


Solomon – Ladies' man who built his cubicle into a Temple


Leah – Even after developing most of the future of the company, still feels second class to her arch nemesis Rachel


Ruth - Only employee who volunteered to stay with the company even after the rough merger


Sarah – She laid off Hagar... for the good of the company.


Mordechai – As a consultant, his stubbornness and insider information helped save the company from disaster


Pinchas – Zealously took on corporate corruption and won


Bilam –Consultant/Contractor brought in to crush the competition, ended up being a loose canon


70 Zikainim –The board of directors


Isaac - Only has his job cause his father Abraham started the place




ps. Dont worry, I had to look a couple of them up myself 

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